Tuesday, February 5

January 2, 2013 my life was forever changed. I finally after 41 plus weeks of pregnancy got to meet my little boy, James. While the first five weeks haven't been as easy as I thought, they also haven't been as difficult as some said they would. Sure there has been frustration after little sleep but nothing that God hasn't shown us out of. The biggest struggle for me has been with breastfeeding. The desire for me to make sure James got the very best I possibly could give him has always been there. I don't not like formula but from everything I've read I know breast milk is best for both of us. The articles detailing all of the benefits are numerous. For the first couple of weeks I tried to nurse, but after two hour feeding sessions I threw in the towel. For the last several weeks I've been exclusively pumping. Most of the blogs and comments I have read talk about how hard pumping is, I think differently. It's probably just because James couldn't seem to get the hang of how to nurse and stay awake...kind of key. Now that I'm able to see how much I'm producing I've struggled to keep up with what he needs. We've been supplementing but with formula at $23 plus a tub I've been stressed. It's escaped me the past few weeks that God always provides! My husband has written a book (not published yet but I'm praying we'll figure out how to soon). While I'm on maternity leave I've been reading it and his third chapter is just the reminder I needed. If God provides for the birds, he'll provide for my little boy. Nursing is the way he created it, breast milk is so wonderful for a reason...cause God made it! It's why formula still to this day after generations of trying still can't compete. God is a God of abundance not of lack so I pray for supply to keep up with my little boy (or should I say not so little). I trust in God and rest in Him that He will supply and it will be through breast milk because that is the desire of my heart and I know I will receive it. It's the way he set out for us to feed our little ones, it's what's best for James, I know He'll provide.  (the black paint is photo shopped)

After only five weeks I'm already having to let go. Let go of all the worries the devil tries to overwhelm a new parent with. Let go of all the worries about lack. I trust God that everything will always be okay, better than okay! So after packing away his first three newborn outfits (did I mention he came out over done...9lbs 5ounces at birth) that don't fit today I know he'll be better than fine and I'll always have enough for him because God will always provide for him and for us. So grateful God has once again shown me the answer. To trust, relax and breath! Now to just remember these things for the next 18 years plus.

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